Delayed Gratification and Higher SAT Scores?

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

These past few weeks have been quite challenging for me as it’s summer vacation and the kids are not in their regular schedule.  Now don’t get me wrong, I love having my kids home for the summer and they definitely need it but it’s hard to keep them busy all the time.  Therefore I do things I probably shouldn’t do to keep them busy and happy …maybe too happy, in fact. You see, during the school year we have RULES – make your bed, use your manners, clear your plate from the table and absolutely NO TV before homework and piano and there is to be NO ice cream or candy during the week. I guess you could say that I’m one of those “delay gratification moms.”

I know what drives me to be like this – my past.  I remember my father always said, “Pumpkin – do you really think you need that?  Why don’t you wait for a few days?  You know, patience is a virtue.” And boy, did that ever cause me to get angry and have a temper tantrum – even when I was teenager. However, now I can truly appreciate why he always wanted me to wait and practice patience. 

I am just like everyone else – I like nice things a lot, new shoes and handbags – but this important life skill of self discipline and delayed gratification that my dad helped me with has kept me from making poor choices and piling on significant amounts of debt. Waiting to purchase those things that I truly coveted and thought I “needed” has been one of the best financial lessons I was taught at a very young age. 

So much comes to our children so easily – they rarely need to wait anymore. A lot of this has been driven by technology (instant messaging, email, music downloads, etc) and the commercialization of our society. All fosters an attitude of “you can get what you want, when you want it.”  Children, including mine, grow up thinking that instant gratification and acquisition of a want – usually a toy or some type of sweet— is the way to happiness!! 

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